echoes the thought: “Suddenly the problem isn’t, ‘I know you so well’, it’s, ‘I don’t know you at all’. In a long marriage, you’ve got the backstory, the front story, you’ve shared a story, maybe had children together, moved through the world together. There are all these shared events and there’s a kind of shorthand between you.”

That old ease might explain why some people choose to reconnect with lovers from their youth: you’ve shared a past, they know John was your favourite Beatle, they’re physically familiar. “This whole dating thing is both exhausting and exciting,” says. “If there’s a spark, it can be really exciting. You can become more set in your ways as you get older. Your habits, your likes and dislikes are more bedded down. It’s good to challenge all that. You actually learn different things about yourself because you’re no longer in a relationship with the person who was your familiar reflective mirror for so long.”

I ask Nick why he persisted with the dating circuit for years, even after so many wrong turns and some heartbreak along the way

It’s not for everyone. Maggie Owens says she knows plenty of women her age who have chosen to be on their own. Continue reading →